Monday, May 4, 2009

Tired...

I am tired tonight.

I'm tired working my butt off in hopes that I'll get a permanent position within my board only to hear that there's going to be none available.

I'm tired of having to prove myself over and over again, and worrying constantly about where I'll be working next year (or if I'll be working next year).

I'm tired of doing a job that I love so much while feeling that I am never doing it good enough.

I'm tired of waiting for all of the things that I want most in life only to feel like they are never going to happen.

I'm tired of feeling guilty for being tired of all of these things.

I'm tired.

B.

2 comments:

Emily MacKenzie said...

Hey sweet B. It's ok to be tired sometimes, don't feel bad. Some days just do that to you ... especially Mondays, stuuupid Mondays!

I (more Andy) can relate a bit on the teaching thing. LTO-ing and supplying can get old, and when you know it's what you want, you just want it to work itself out already!

Waiting is just not natural. We want what we want when our hearts desire it. Yet, we trust God's timing above our own. And that, you guessed it, is tiring!

Don't feel guilty, just be there in your tiredness and bring that to God. He can handle it, the good, the bad, the tired. He can take it all.

You are on my thoughts and in my prayers!

p.s. If I lived closer, I would make you cookies and bring them over. :)

Rhonda said...

Been there, done that. It's horrible! My heart goes out to all of you young teachers who are trying to get in. Sometimes I felt so weary of walking on eggs. I still get excited every time I see my name on my classroom door or on a report card. After being where you are I don't think I will ever take my job for granted.